I'm taking to the bed

I saw it on the internet yesterday afternoon.

I was immediately devastated.

I went down the hall to tell Bingmama.

Me: I have just found out some awful news.

Bingmama: What is it?

Me: {shaking head, unable to speak}

Bingmama: You found out Jordan has a volleyball game tonight that you didn't know about???

Me: {shaking head, unable to speak}

Bingmama: Mmmmmmmmmm.....Derek Jeter is hurt?????

Me: {shaking head, unable to speak}

Bingmama: DEREK JETER IS ENGAGED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

(Now THAT, my beloved readers, is a true friend. She got that in three guesses people. Three guesses!!)

So we begin to do a little research on my boyfriend's new fiancee'. (Is it just me or is there something just wrong about how that sounds?). And in true friend fashion, she helps me try to figure out what Minka Kelly has that I don't have?

She has brown hair.
I have brown hair.

She has brown eyes.
I have brown eyes.

Her mother is dead.
My father is dead.

Her father is a guitarist for Aerosmith.
I listen to Aerosmith music.
I actually MET Aerosmith back in my radio days.
Annnnnd, I rode the Rock 'n Roller coaster twice during my last trip to Disney.

She is of Irish and French descent.
I wear green on St. Patrick's Day.
I have eaten French Toast AND French Fries. AND I have had a French Manicure.

(So far, this battle is pretty even. I may have a slight edge with all my French stuff.....)

She went to school to be a surgical technician.
I work at a clinic that has a surgery center.

She stars on Friday Night Lights.
I go to high school football games on Friday nights.

Again, we are neck in neck. Even the Captain said our similarities are almost uncanny.

I just don't get it....

In the meantime, I'm calling into work today devastated.

But I leave you with this Derek Jeter Haiku:

Jeter now engaged.
What's she got that I don't have?
Please don't answer that.