Tweetin on da Twitter

Target is putting out the back to school stuff. #NoThankYou

Breaking news of possible officer down. Always makes me sick at my stomach.

Fallen officer. Dislike.

Which one is Phinease and which one is Ferb?

Playing Boy's Tony Hawk skateboard Wii game thing. Boy hollering at me to "grab some big air". I'm just trying not to fall off the board.

"I must have decided to delay that." = Fancy talk for "I forgot."

ha ha ha ha ha...not

I want football.

The Boy: "Dad, do we have to take your car? It's so... policey."

The Boy has confused a wingman and a hitman. #FutureDatingDisaster

Rude people are just so ... rude.

The Boy: "I'm hungry." The Captain: "What would you like?" Boy: "Dinner."

The Boy tried to make cheese dip by putting 3 cheese sticks in the microwave for FIVE MINUTES.