twitterrrrrr!

Guess I'll head to bed now so I can listen to the Captain snore all night.

Dear Son: Please do not tie your wrestling figures to the dog.

Yes, I just fixed my broken glasses with purple duct tape.

It's just not a party until you spill a container of dressing down the front of your pants.

I just got a text from @connie423 that says, "T ugbb". No doubt it's code for something...

Involved in a sordid love affair with my crock pot.

When did I start liking country music? I'm scared. And I blame @vball199 and the Captain.

Trying to figure out why I have a bottle of BBQ sauce in my purse.

Talking about snakes at lunch. I'm not digging this convo.