Twit.Ta.

So my week on Twitter went something like this....

Cue Charlie Brown teacher voice.

I may or may not have just tried to fax something on the copy machine and almost made 767,000 copies.

I just poured a whole cup of water down my shirt. Brilliant.

Monday Night Football. The End.

Somebody stole my tape dispenser.

Did I really just enter eight times four on a calculator?

I'm trying to go to sleep and the Captain is watching a Jimi Hendrix concert on TV. That's problematic.

"It's always a good day when you aren't personally named in a lawsuit."

Believe me, it's not a party until you spill a bottle of salad dressing on your desk. #WootWoot

Conjunction Junction, what's your function?

Hello, Volleyball. I've missed you.

Dear CrockPot: Thank you for having a delicious dinner waiting for me 14 hours after I walked out on you this morning.

Fri. Day. Hoo. Ray.

Just got carded buying milk.