Sssssshhhhhhh!

I've mentioned that Bingmama and I are season subscribers to the theatre. Don't you remember last year's Wizard of Oz show?

Well, last night we headed downtown to see Dreamgirls.

And we did what every smart, middle-aged women do. (OK, so I'm middle-aged. Bingmama isn't quite middle aged. In fact, when we went to Bon Jovi, she told somebody I was her mother. Anyway, I'll move on past the old woman references.)

Where was I?

Oh right, we did what any smart person would do when they go to the fancy theatre to see a Broadway show.

We snuck candy inside.

Which is better than the woman I saw last night who pulled a sleeve of Ritz crackers out of her purse. Yes, I'm serious.

I had a box of Lemonheads in my purse. And she had a bag of individually wrapped Starburst. Sadly, the Hot Tamales wouldn't fit in our tiny bags and had to stay in the car.

We were minding our own business, eating our candy, and watching heartbroken Effie telling Curtis she Is Not Going while he and the Dreams go on without her...Poor Effie....

That's when it happened.

The gal in front of Bingmama turned around and said,

"Would you please stop it with the paper?"

What? Did the gal in Row R Seat 204 call Bingmam out for rattling her candy paper?

It appears so.

Bingmama took the scolding pretty well and did what any mature adult would do.

She rolled the candy papers into little spit wads and shot them into the hair of Row R Seat 204 Gal.

OK, she really didn't do that.

But we may or may not have snickered at her later during the standing ovation and we saw that her date was about 5' 2".

So Bingmama said, "Your date is a midget!!"

OK, she really didn't do that either.

We just decided next time we would bring a big ol' bag of Doritos.

Chips anyone?

Alrighty, people.

It's Friday.

I'm tired.

And I just might wrap a Christmas present this weekend.

Or not.

I went to the desert on a post with no name.

Before we get started, let's take a moment and show our appreciation for Friday and thank him for finally showing up. {cue applause}

Now I must tell you about my Big Bad Wolf. I know I'm just going to sound like a proud mama, but....HE TOTALLY ROCKED IT. Even though he had talked about being nervous, it never showed and he hit that stage and danced around and twirled his tail and sang his little wolfy heart out. He was a real....wait for it....HAM. {bah-dah-bing}. Anyway, he really was a hit. And I'm so very proud of him.

Our guests from Wyoming, Bruce & Lars, are here. They spent two days turkey hunting with the Captain before arriving yesterday. After everybody got home from hunting, and performing, and volleyballing, and working, we all sat down to a yummy dinner of The Pioneer Woman's Drip Beef. (Seriously people, if you haven't made this yet, you should. Run, don't walk, to your crock pot and fix it today.) It was a yummy dinner with good conversation.

All was well.

Until I looked down and saw a tick crawling across my arm.

Now, there were several things wrong with this situation.

First and foremost, THERE WAS A TICK CRAWLING ACROSS MY ARM.

At the dinner table.

In front of our guests.

Truth be known, the tick probably came from one of the three hunters as I found out later that wasn't the first tick that had been discovered that afternoon.

And then before the dishes could be cleaned from the table, the Captain found one stuck in his arm.

Yuck people.

Serious yuck.

However, I was the only one who was even remotely freaked out or embarrassed by this.

Because, as hard as this is to believe, I'm really not used to having ticks crawl across my arm. At the dinner table. In front of guests.

And then our lovely dinner conversation went south. And it turned into tick stories.

Then snake stories.

And that's when I started to get light headed and nauseated and almost had to take to the bed.

After dinner, Bruce attempted to teach me how to play Cribbage. Anybody know how to play this? It's fun. But confusing. And it's a lot of adding and mathy stuff which I am not good at. (I don't like numbers, I like letters.) Lots of rules and things to remember. Points for this and points for that. Fifteens, pairs, two-four-six-eight, who do we appreciate. I accused him of making it all up as he went along. And fully expected for him to get two points because I sneezed during the game. And I also learned that if somebody does real well, you are supposed to say, "Now that was some good pegging." Whatever that means. And after two games, I finally have a loose grasp of how to play. I think. Anyway, he was excited to teach me and he was patient with my Lucy Ricardo style of learning.

That's what's going on in my world right now. Drip beef. And ticks. And Cribbage. Be jealous of my very exciting life.

Oh - and have a super weekend!

The Bird, the Big Bad Wolf, and the Houseguests

Yesterday Jordan found a dead baby bird in our front yard. At first we thought it was from the dove nest on the porch, but I'm not sure those babies have hatched yet. And this wasn't close enough to that nest for him to have even fallen out. So maybe there is another nest in our tree. Not sure.

I went out and scooped him up in a pizza box gave him a proper birdie funeral and put him in the garbage can buried him in the bird cemetary.

RIP little birdie.

In other news...

Cooper is playing The Big Bad Wolf tomorrow in the class production of "The Three Piggy Opera". Has singing solos and everything. Eeeeeek!! He's so excited and has been singing all the songs for the last two weeks. I know them all by heart and am very confident that I could be an understudy for the role. Sing with me people...."I want a big fat pig to eat....yummy yummy yummy.... soooooooooie".

He must be thinking WOLF 24-7 because two nights ago, he came running through the house at 3am screaming about the bad wolf sitting in church reading the newspaper. I guess that is scary if you are 7 years old. And it's three in the morning.

And in case you were wondering, it's hard this time of year to find a black long sleeved shirt and boy size black pants for the wolf costume.

The Captain has a friend (Bruce) and his college-age son (Lars) passing through town this week. They live in Wyoming (I think it's Wyoming -- it's one of those states over there on the left.) and the son goes to school in Nashville. So they are on their way home.

The Captain and Bruce went to the big fancy policey school together in Quantico a few years ago. For 4 months. Yes, the Captain was gone for six years four months. Too bad I wasn't blogging at the time because fodder abounded!!

OK, I digress, where was I? Oh yes, I was saying that the Captain swears he told me they would be staying with us five days instead of the one day that I actually recall. No, I'm pretty sure I know the difference between houseguests for FIVE days and houseguests for ONE day. Oh well. It's all good.

I am just a tad concerned, however, about how much food a teenage boy who has been eating school cafeteria food since August will eat. I may need one of those Three Little Pigs that Cooper has been singing about....Stay tuned for Adventures with Bruce & Lars.

Alrighty....That's it for me my lovely people. I think I just heard The Weather Man say we may have some sunshine today. And all the people said amen.

At least we won't be having hail that looks like this.