Get in.

Yesterday I drove.
And drove.
And drove.

Left home.
Drove Jordan to school.
Drove Cooper to school.
Drove to work.
Drove home for lunch.
Drove back to work.
Drove to pick Jordan up from school.
Drove home.
Drove to Cooper's game.
Drove home.
Drove to pick Jordan up from volleyball practice.

Drove
Drove
Drove

And, since each of the above destinations are in total opposite areas of the city, my route resembled some sort of obscure geometric shape.

I logged 95.7 miles on my car.

Beep beep.

I dooooooo!

Nineteen years ago today, the Captain and I said I DO.

And I became Mrs. Captain.

We dated 58 years before we got married, so we've really been together 962 years.

That's a long time, people.

A lot of water under the old marital bridge.

We thought we were going to get to sleep super early last night - 7:30.  Yes, 7:30.  I'm telling you we are a real live Mamaw and Pawpaw.  

But, the home phone rang. and rang. and rang. and rang.

And, the Captain's work phone rang. and rang. and rang. and rang.

So we ended up going to sleep at 10:00.  Which is late for a Mamaw and Pawpaw.

Then, this morning at 4:15 am, we woke up to the sound of Gauge getting sick.  Which is a sound all to itself.  Not really the best way to wake up.  On your anniversary or any other day for that matter.

Then while he was trying to tell me Happy Anniversary, the Captain rolled over and poked me in the eye.

I love my life.

Really.

So much.

Giddy up

Tomorrow brings a marathon of a crazy long day filled with a little bit of basketball and a whole lot of volleyball.

We will be leaving the house at 8am and should be home around 10pm.

I'll need to pack rations.

Can somebody bring me a pizza around 6pm or so?  Thanks.

But at least we are in town.

And the kids' games don't coincide.

So there's that.

See ya on the flip side.

For your viewing pleasure

 

I call these "Weird pictures I found on my iPhone"

 

 

 

 

 

Ch-ch-ch-changes

Turning a big page today.

I have a new job! 

Today is my last day at my soon to be former job. 

I've been there almost 12 years.  That's a long time.  A lotta' life happened during that time.   It's been a good run.

But, time for bigger and better things so I'm moving on to greener pastures.

I'll still be doing marketing and public relations.  Similar to what I've been doing.  Just bigger.  Moving over to a hospital medical group setting.

Lots of thoughts and emotions as I wrap things up and tell folks adios. 

My office is bare and my to do list is short.  I'm just a lame duck.

I'm taking the rest of the week off and starting the new gig on Monday. 

If I don't have TB.

The TB test is part of the hiring process.

Not real sure what my arm is supposed to look like this morning.

That would be bad if I had TB.

*cough cough*

Anyway, pretty big stuff happening with me.

Turning pages and closing doors today.

scissor song

I heard Cooper singing a song yesterday.

A song about scissors.

It went something like this....

"Sciiissorrrrs

Sciiissorrrrs

They cut hair

And origami stuff

And people's fingers on accident..."

Then the dog tooted.

And the scissor song ended.

Because nine year old boys think tooting dogs are hilarious.

Tuesday night review

A recap of the evening at mi casa.
Jordan went to the gym and the Captain was going to pick her up on his way home from work.

Then we found out the Captain was at his mom's house working on his boat.  That was fine.  It's near the gym.

Text from Jordan:  Somebody come get me.

Text from me:  Text your dad.  He's near.

And she waited and waited. 

Then their exchange went something like this:

Hello??  Want me to start walking?

And he apparently said yes. 

Because she started walking.

But then he picked her up part way. No worries.

My dinner was nuts because I really didn't feel like making anything.  Or even thinking of anything.  So we had some pasta.  And pizza bites.  Because they are kind of Italianish so it went along with the theme and I pretended like it was a perfect side dish.

Then I heard Cooper say, "Hey dad, wanna' whittle?"

The Captain told Coop to go find some sticks.

I don't think this is what he had in mind.

They broke off a few small pieces off that tree thing and then they started whittling.  Like Jed and Jethro.

Me and my kindle had grand plans to sit outside with the Clampett boys but those were thwarted by Jordan and a 5 page study guide for an English final exam.

So we reviewed all sorts of poetry terms and fancy things like that.

While she held Gauge in her lap like a baby.

It was ... odd....

Because he usually doesn't like to be held.  Much less cuddled.  And he is ... big. 

Look at these goobers.



Then Cooper started catching sticks on fire with my bug candle.

And I actually said these things out loud:

Do not catch the dog on fire.

Do not catch your sister's hair on fire.

Do not catch the chair cushions on fire.

Then it got dark and we all came inside.    Cooper started asking about how fast cardboard burns.  I may have a problem here....

Then he drug out that geo gami book again. 

So I took a stab at a hexahedron.

Whatever that is....

It only ended up with a little kite looking thing.  I don't think that's a hexahedron.

I told him he can't wait until 9pm to start working on these things.  Because my brain is tired and my eyes don't work.

So we all went to bed.

And I woke up at 3am. And have been awake ever since.

The end.

I must have blinked....

Tomorrow, this....

.... turns 15.



How did that happen??

Happy Birthday, Jordan!

Wednesday-ing

Wednesday starting.
Thunder booming.
Rain pouring.
Family sleeping.
Coffee brewing.
Angie yawning.
Throat hurting.
Laundry washing.
Book tempting.
Lasagna thawing.
Wednesday starting.

Awww, nuts.

Last night featured another exciting convo with the Captain... We discussed the deeply intellectual topic of nuts.

Nuts.

Be jealous of our most exciting and incredibly romantic life.

Yes, we discuss nuts while we watch shows about people who catch fish with their hands.

Yeah...I know...

So, back to the nuts....

I'm not a fan of the almond. I know he's supposed to be the healthiest nut and great snack and all that stuff. But to me, almonds taste like cardboard. Ick.

The peanut is just a good all-around nut. He tries to be a pleaser. But doesn't always cut it.

Now, the cashew. That's a nut. He's definitely Best in Show. And yes, I'm one of those who pick the cashews out of a bowl of mixed nuts. Don't judge. At least I'm honest about it.

Coming in a close second is the pistachio. While there's a bit of work involved with this little fella', he's mighty yummy.

All those other nuts? Whatever they are... No thanks.

If you want to share your nutty opinion, sound off.

Otherwise, have a good weekend.

V'Day

Did you have a nice Valentine's Day?

The Captain brought me some candy.

And he also fixed my flat tire.

How romantic is that?

Yep. Laying on his back out there on the cold driveway pulling a big ol' nail out of my tire.

True. Love.

And, for dinner, I made chili. Because, it was, you know, chilly.

Then I sat at Jordan's volleyball practice for three hours.

This morning I'm sleepy.

And I'm going to snort coffee straight from the can.

Bye.

It's for our own good.

Yes, I confess I am now obsessed with Bejeweled.

Although I sometimes call it Bedazzled.

Which is kind of the same, but different.

And, I still play Words with Friends. I've got at least 20 games lots of games going.

I don't really see this as a waste of time.

I view it more as an investment in my future.

Brain exercises.

I'll be sharp as a tack when I'm old and gray. Well, rather, when I'm oldER and grayER.

When I was playing "just onnnnnnne more game" of Bedazzled last night, I told the Captain that one day he would thank me for all of this game playing because when we are old, my brain will be fit as a fiddle and I'll be able to take care of him. But I said that he won't know what's going on then because his brain will be mushy from watching all those Bigfoot shows. So he'd better thank me now.

He did not really agree with my logic.

Made perfect sense to me.

Now, if you'll excuse me, I've got to go try to beat my Bejeweled high score of 154,350.

Just Another Manic Monday

There really is a good explanation about this picture.

And, yes, I will confess that's me....

On the right.

The Captain's sister is on the left. The Chef sister.

She's in town and came over to hang out Monday night. After we introduced her to Just Dance, we played Quelf. Ever play that game? (JuJu, PLEEEEEEASE tell me you have this game. It's *perfect* for you and your crew...)

The game requires you to do all sorts of wild stuff.

Like "make a mask out of household items and wear it until you land on a green spot"

Yeah, that was my card. So I did that.

Construction paper, coffee filters, and a headband.

And my precious daughter took a picture. And posted it on the World Wide Web. I love her.

Why there is no picture of Chef Sister with toilet paper all over her head as she pretends to be a mummy or one of the Captain performing a rousing rendition of "I'm a Little Teapot" is beyond me.... *ahem*

If you can get past me in that lovely mask, there are some other most interesting things in that picture.

Yes, I have on pajamas. And slippers. Don't hate.

And check out the big M on the mantle. It's supposed to be a W - an awesome Christmas gift from Connie. But Chef Sister's name - which used to start with a W - now starts with an M. And, upon her arrival at mi casa, she flipped it over. So there's that.

Please take note of the lovely mauve gigantic bean bag. That is not a permanent fixture in my den. But during the lazy winter days, Cooper drags it downstairs and plops in it in front of the TV.

Oh, with his two footballs. Yeah.

So, there ya' go. A "normal" night at my house.

Say Cheese. Or Bow Wow.

What do you get when you add:
A boy
A dog
A hat
A camera phone
and
A bed that's not made (don't judge).


Bubba Dog

Sleepy Dog

Word to your Dog.

It's how we roll

This is what we woke up to yesterday morning.

This is what we woke up to this morning.

My thoughts and observations:

1. Yes, we cleaned it up yesterday. And by we, I mean Jordan. She conned Cooper into helping.

2. Monday night's job was with much better quality TP.

3. As a former champion roller, I think the perpretators failed to use the height of the trees to their full advantage.

4. The rollers did not TOUCH the squad car parked in my driveway. Smart.

5. The Captain is slightly humored by this. He has not yet used the words "vandalism" or "trespassing". Nor has he rattled off some sort of annotated state code. He's been fairly quiet.

6. I think it is hilarious.

7. There are parents who get VERY mad about this sort of thing.

8. As long as there is no damage done to property or vehicles, I don't have a problem with it.

9. A good yard rolling is a sign that your kids are well-liked.

10. I have rolled MANY a yard in my day.

11. The last time I rolled a yard, I was 7 months pregnant with Jordan. I was afraid the cops were going to come. And that would mean the Captain. Talk about awkward.

12. There is a list of suspects.

13. Bingmama has now been added to that list. She came over for dinner last night. The Captain just told me he saw an 18 pack of Charmin in her back seat when he was helping put Baby Bing in the car. Hmmmmm.

14. Jordan does not yet know about Rolling #2 as she sleeps until 1:45pm every day.

15. The squiggly paper in that last picture is an attempt at "Jordan". Although it is difficult to write in cursive with toilet paper. I'd give The Rollers an E for effort there.

16. The Captain just went to the front door. Checked out last night's activity and said "Humph." I just explained to him that while there are some standards to rolling, there are also some standards to cleaning up. And that includes leaving the TP up long enough for all the neighbors to see.

17. One of my neighbors might come over and start cleaning it up. He's the same one who occasionally trims my bushes if they get out of control.

18. He's also the same man who edges his yard with hand clippers. He's patient. And a perfectionist. And probably has to take medication when he looks at the weeds in my flower beds.

19. His name is Johnny. His wife's name is Johnnie. We call them The Johnnies.

20. Yes, these last three points were a stretch, but I felt the need to round this list off at 20 and I had no more rolling thoughts, so I had to start making things up.

Wishing you peace and love.
And toilet paper.

Movie. Midnight. Mamaw.

I must confess ...

I've never seen a Harry Potter movie.

Not one.

Ever.

Do you still love me?

And tonight at midnight is the premier of the last ever Harry Potter movie.

Is it the last one?

I don't even know.

Nor do I really care.

Jordan is going with some friends.

No, I'm not taking her.

Or picking her up.

Some other suckers really great moms are taking a group of teens.

Jordan is spending the night with some gals.

So I don't even have to stay up for her, and I can proceed with my most boring exciting evening plans of watching some ridiculous Sasquatch show with the Captain and then going to bed by 8:30 pm.

I don't get out much.

That's why I've never seen Harry Potter.

And I'm really ok with that.

Have a nice day.

Love,
Mamaw

Broken leg

Cooper says out of the blue last night, "How much does a coffee table cost?"

"Ummmm, why would you say that?"

I had been in and out of the den but then noticed he had propped the Wii balance board and a stool in front of The Coffee Table.

Now, The Coffee Table has already been moved to accommodate the Man Cave - also known as two dining room chairs, a card table and some sheets. The Man Cave is right in the middle of my den. The Man Cave may warrant an entire blog post to itself. It features three rooms and a chimney-style mail slot. Quite impressive, actually.

Anyway, back to The Coffee Table. In an effort to still walk through my house in a relatively unobstructed fashion, I moved the coffee table.

And, after a closer look, I found this:


Yeah, it's not a party until your kid breaks the leg off the coffee table.

Now, lest ye think that The Coffee Table is some fancy, nice, very expensive piece of furniture, let me reassure you that is the farthest thing from the truth.

This table is probably 22 or 23 years old. Connie & I bought it when we first moved into our little town house.

And, lest ye think that The Coffee Table has not incurred any other damage, let me reassure you that is also the farthest thing from the truth.

One of legs - and it might even be that one - may or may not have fallen victim to a fracture when it had a run in with an entire SWAT team. And don't think that was during some raid or anything. It was more along the lines of a social gathering that the Captain hosted once. A long, long time ago.

The table has seen its share of puppy gnawing, lego playing, homework doing, food eating, foot propping...Good times, people. Good times.

Cooper is upset that he broke The Coffee Table. Even though I have shown him all its war wounds. And told him that it's 23 years old. And probably only cost $50 when we bought it.

I'm hoping the Captain can fix it. Surely a little glue can get The Coffee Table back into action. A little Elmers should do the trick. Right?

Life. It's good.

My two boys.

Watching baseball.




Look at their legs and feet.

Love that.

Do NOT look at the toy wrestling ring, Nerf gun and Wii games all piled up in the chair back there.

Don't judge.

And what is that at the bottom of the picture?

{panning out}


It's the Bloggie Doggie!

Hello Bloggie Doggie!

Guess he wasn't too interested in the baseball game.


Have a happy day people. Play nice.

Like

So I pulled the ol' Barbie dolls out since they resurfaced while we were cleaning out the attic.

Connie and I used to really play us some Barbies.

Just looking at the cases makes me feel all warm and fuzzy...




Now, way back in the 70's, the decor of this room was beyond cool. And I'd like you to take special note of the homemade lamp on the little table. Yes, it's a spool and a nut cup. Barbie Creativity at its finest.

Barbie with the wild hair wearing the glittery gold evening gown and her lovely brown coat with white fur. I think Mom actually made that little dress. Yes, she used to sew Barbie clothes for us. And that used to be a Barbie Pet Poodle but now it looks like a Barbie Pet Llama.

Sleeping on the blow up bed in the Mom-made sleeping bag.

Good times, people. Good times.

If you need me this weekend, I'll be at a volleyball tournament. But you probably already figured that out.

Ciao!

Rub a dub

Dear Stinky Boy that Smells Like a Small Farm Animal:

You have been taking a bath every night now for about eight years.

Every night.

Eight years.

So it should come as no surprise when I say - every night - "Time to take a bath."

And there is no need really for you to say, "WHAT?!!?!?"

And drop your jaw wide open.

And look at me like I have never said that before.

So just march it into the bathroom.

And quit that foot stomping.

And eye rolling.

And yes,

You have to use soap.

Because "wet" doesn't equal "clean".

And, oh yeah, those times when you get out of the bath,

(Or better yet, the SHOWER)

and your hair is still DRY....

That's not cutting it either.

Because I really don't buy the whole

"My hair dries really, really fast" nonsense.

And, while we're at it,

Please do not put on the exact same (DIRTY) clothes you had on.

Let's try some clean ones.

Oh, and underwear is always a good idea.

Thanks.

Love,
Mom