stuff

It's Friday.
I think.
My brain has not returned to full function.
We are headed out this weekend.
Again.
For a volleyball tournament.
Last one of the season.
It's Jordan's last tournament ever.
Ever.
Yes, she is hanging up her knee pads.
More on this later when I can generate a complete thought.
I feel so discombobulated.
That's a big word for somebody who can't think straight.
Be impressed.
Plus, I still have my Easter decorations up in my house.
Is that ok?
That drives me nuts.
But I can't help it.
Happy Easter.
And, have a good weekend.

Monday Miscellany

Woke up confused this morning.
Was I at the beach?
Hotel?
Home?
Getting up for work?
School?
Volleyball?
Church?
What time is it?
What day is it?
Where am I?
Who am I?

Our tired booties drug in last night at 9:30.
But, we had a great weekend.
Jordan's team won FIRST PLACE!
WOOO HOOOOOO!
It really was a good weekend.
Makes it a tiny bit easier to come home late when you're the gold champion.
Woot.
So much fun to watch her play this weekend.

How'd your bracket hold up?
I am feeling a bit better that I'm now tied with Gauge going into the Sweet Sixteen.
We're sitting on ten correct picks.  Not too bad all upsets considered.

Speaking of upset...
I'm upset about my Tigers.
We'll be back better than ever next year.

Big week ahead.
Cooper and I are headed to Nashville.
Twice.
More on that later.
And the Captain and Jordan are going to Honduras.
More on that later, too.

In the meantime, I'll be dosing out the malaria medicine and making school lunches like a boss.

Ciao!

Numero Uno

Remember last Monday when I wrote this:

So it kind of feels like I headed out of town Friday afternoon and spent two days in a convention center gym full of volleyball and shared a tiny double bed with Jordan and got no sleep and then got home last night and didn't really have a weekend. That's what it feels like.

Well, it's about the same thing this morning.

Except instead of sharing a tiny double bed with Jordan, I shared the pull out couch with Cooper. 

THAT, my friends, is a quality sleep situation.

Our hotel was full of volleyball players, lacross players, and farmers.

Well, I found out there were farmers AND ranchers.

And, I also found out there's a difference between farmers and ranchers.

I thought I was the only one who didn't really understand this concept until both my kids rattled off the definitions of each in a "doesn't everybody know this" fashion.

OK, then...

Farmers and ranchers are a little loud in a hotel setting. Yee ha.

And, apparently lacross players are rowdy too, because the Captain overheard a dad proudly say the cops had only been called to the hotel twice the night before.

On the volleyball front... We had been on the road almost an hour Friday evening when I asked Jordan - as I always do - if she had her volleyball bag.  She always ALWAYS says yes.

Except Friday night.

When she said no.

Oh dear.

The Captain pulled over in the middle of dark nowhereville Arkansas and took evvvvvveryyyyyyything out of the back in hopes the knee pads and ankle braces were there.  To no avail.

U turn on I-40.

So there's that.

But the weekend ended up being super duper because they won FIRST PLACE!!!!

Hooray Hooray for winning first in gold!!!

I am so happy for those girls.  And proud.  And, yes I cried.

Then we got in the car and the Captain and I sang 80s songs out loud all the way home.

And I kept making him taste the water that I got from the burger drive through that tasted like dirt until he agreed with me.

And I beat him in arm wrestling.   The fact that he was driving had nothing to do with it, however.

Then we pulled in the garage at 9:30.

And I slept like a baby in a BED.

The end.

No Tigers

So, yeah, we are headed out for yet another volleyball tournament this weekend.

And that means this weekend, I won't get to see the Tigers vs. the Tigers playing baseball here in Memphis.

My Memphis Tigers vs. the Missouri Tigers.

I'm very good friends with the head coach of Mizzou.

Kind of.

Actually, well, I'm very good friends with the SISTER of the head coach of Mizzou.

(Hi JuJu!!)

OK, well, I haven't really met her in person.

But that's just a minor point, because I feel like I know her.

We are friends.  Yes. 

So if I (kind of) know her, and she knows him, then I know him.  Right?   Yes.

The ol' If a = b and b = c, then a = c transitive equality property.

(Be impressed that I knew that.)

And, I could go to the game and stand down at the fence and holler "Heeyyyyyy Coach Tim!! It's me, Angie!!  I'm a friend of JuJu!!  Well, kind of... Heyyyy!!!"

I just told this to the Captain and he looked at me (with THAT look) and said, "They would call security on you."

So, looks like I won't be seeing any Tigers.

Or Head Coaches.

Have I mentioned that he's quite handsome and I have a crush on him?  Probably not because that's very stalkerish... And probably makes JuJu feel uncomfortable when I talk about her Cutie Head Coach Brother.

And maybe it's best if I don't see him this weekend because he might think I'm a total weirdo.

Which actually isn't far from the truth.

So, anyhoo....

No baseball for me.  Just lots and lots and lots of volleyball.

If you're in Conway, Arkansas this weekend, stop by court five and say hi.

Brett. Crock. Crazy.

Sorry I didn't post yesterday.

First of all, I was recovering from spending fifteen of my waking hours at the volleyball tournament.

And, hanging out with Brett Favre.

And by hanging out, I mean sitting in the same 150,000 square foot convention center as him and being very interested in the match he was watching.  He was there watching his daughter.   He's tall.  I don't think he had on Wranglers.  And, I will reassure you that he is aging very nicely. 

Yesteray, I was also busy turning another year older.

Can't believe I'm finally 40.

BAHAHAHAHAHA

I'm super excited about my gift from the Captain and the kids.

It's... A NEW CROCKPOT.

Most women would smack their husbands in the face and walk out if they got a crock pot for their birthday, but I clapped my hands with glee and wiped tears of joy from my eyes.

It's a super duper crock pot.  The Cadillac of all crock pots.

I'm really excited about it. 

We spent the evening last night at Coop's basketball game. It was a loss for the Lions.  Coop had a good game with four steals. I was proud of him.  I was also proud of myself for not smacking any of the opposing team's parents who were beyond obnoxious.  But, I figured it would ruin my birthday if I started slugging these rude folks.   Especially the dad who was losing his ever loving mind over a missed double dribble call - when his son's team was up by 20 points with :15 second left.  Simmer down, Mister. 

That sums it up.

Good times.

Giddy up

Tomorrow brings a marathon of a crazy long day filled with a little bit of basketball and a whole lot of volleyball.

We will be leaving the house at 8am and should be home around 10pm.

I'll need to pack rations.

Can somebody bring me a pizza around 6pm or so?  Thanks.

But at least we are in town.

And the kids' games don't coincide.

So there's that.

See ya on the flip side.

Review

These things happened this weekend.  Yes, I'm serious:

We saw a dead body on the ground in downtown Birmingham as we drove through there.  Squad cars everywhere.  Jordan said "Oh, they've got a guy on the ground.  He's on the ground. Oh, they are putting a sheet on him.  Dead body. Dead body. Dead body."

That kind of went away when she found out the college football all star game players were staying in the same hotel we were in.

So she went from "Dead body. Dead body. Dead body." to "Football players. Football players. Football players."

In case you were wondering, real live college football players are huge.  I saw two guys the size of a side by side refrigerator.  And another guy in the elevator that was the size OF the elevator.

Let's see... what else....

We rode to dinner with another volleyball mom.  And, in the process of almost running out of gas, got lost and got semi accosted by a hobo.

Volleyball... played well.  Won a few.  Lost more.  First tourny of the year.  Working some kinks out.  Looking forward to a good season.  And a tournament IN TOWN next weekend.  Holla.

Other awkward weird stuff with awkward weird people in the hotel.

I may or may not have been jamming to Pitbull twice during this trip and once missed my exit and another time missed the interstate exit entirely. 

I almost got run off the road last night on the way home.  Had to swerve over in the shoulder.

Glad to finally get home last night.  Guess we drug in about 7:30 pm.

The Captain's grandmother is back in the hospital with some side effects from her chemo.

Also, Jordan's boyfriend's dad had a small stroke yesterday.  He's three months out from a bone marrow transplant for AML, and has been doing well, so there are lots of questions going on there.

Thanks for praying for Betty W. and Bruce T.

Kids out of school today.  The Captain is off work.  But he's gone coyote hunting.  I'm not really sure what that means.  But that's what he's doing.  I have to go to work.  I would think with the combo of the holiday and the inauguration, we should be off work.

Speaking of the inauguration, why does he have to be reinaugurated?  He's already President and has the keys to the House.  So why another party?  I don't get it.

Anyway, my brain and body and emotions are tired today.  But it's the first of many weary post tournament Mondays ahead.  Might as well get used to it.

Happy Monday.

On the road again

This weekend kicks off club volleyball season.
Well, the practices have been going on since November.
But today starts the grand highway tour of the southeast.
I'm going to Alabama.
With a banjo on my knee.
The boys aren't going.
Basketball here in town for them.
OK, other than accidentally washing and drying Jordan's set of Greek alphabet flash cards and being obsessed with the fake girlfriend story, that's about it for me.
Deuces.

No title for a post about nothing

I can't seem to get my brain rolling this morning.

 

I stayed up too late last night watching that train wreck also known as Honey Boo Boo.  And, I don't recommend watching it right before bed since it makes for some crazy dreams.

 

I've already spilled a huge cup of coffee on my bathroom counter, so my day is off to a banner start.

 

So, I'm just going to share this picture with you.

 

I call it "Look at Jordan jump and she probably should have been called for being over the net but they didn't call it so OK."

 

 

That's all for today.

Good bye.

Weekend yays and boos

Well, where do I even start with what happened this weekend....

Yays and Boos. 

Jordan's team won second place in their tournament on Saturday!  Yay! Yay!

RIP Ozzy the psycho aquatic frog.  Poor crazy frog. Now, he's in the baggie in the freezer with the other fish that have passed on.  Because if we take the dead fishies back with the receipt, we get our $6.75 back. 

I'm reading a yummy book.  "Gone Girl."  Majorly twisty turny.  Thanks, JuJu for the thumbs up. 

Fall temps showed their face. So so so ready for fall.  More than ever.  Go away 100 degree summer that has lasted six months.

I can't even really talk about the Hogs.  I'm still stunned, sad, and pouting.  Lost the game. Lost our QB, CB, and RB. Lost our College Game Day visit. Lost our ranking. I've lost my marbles.  Waaaahhhhh.   Oh, and this weekend, we take on Bama.  Lovely.

We started painting The Figures' Luxury Condo. 

Alright, people.  That about sums it up.

Now Monday is here.

Hope he plays nice.

Another trip. And a maybe trip.

Me and my little travel size toothpaste are back on the road tonight.

No, not volleyball.

Although there is volleyball this weekend....

Coop and I are headed to Nashville for a church youth leadership thing.

The Captain and Jordan are staying in town for a one-day tournament. Grand prize for the winner of the tourney? A no-expense paid trip to the national junior volleyball championship thingy in Columbus, Ohio in July. With three more months of practice thrown in for a bonus.

So, yeah, Go Team.

Kind of.

I guess.

In the meantime, have a nice weekend. May you find a chocolate bunny in your basket.

Hotlanta

So proud to say we have survived the weekend in Hotlanta.

We had a fun little adventure.

It was a lotta' volleyball.

And so. many. people.

It was loud. Loud. LOUD.

We finished 64th.

Out of 85,320 teams.

OK, I'm kidding.

Well, not about the 64th part.

We survived riding the train thing to and fro.

Lots to see on the ol' train.

We saw two men ... ummm ... getting to know each other. And a man with a gun tucked in his pants. Yes, a gun. And, I'm sure we saw lots of other things that I have blocked out of my short term memory.

I am convinced I could not survive in a big city like that with all the traffic and train stuff and people. That city would chew me up and spit me out.

We bought tickets to the Mega Millions Lottery at a little stop and pump in Georgia. We were sure we were going to win. Since we found a penny in the parking lot. And I pumped two gallons of gas on my pants. Those seemed like great signs.

But, no, I didn't win.

I just had a penny.

And pants that smelled like gas.

Jordan wanted to know if we won, could I quit work.

Yes, dear. If we won $640 million, I could quit work.

But no winning ticket for me.

So I'm headed to work this morning.

Still poor.

And tired.

Poor and tired.

I sound like the Statue of Liberty...

I'm sure I have more to share about the Wild Hotlanta Volleyball Adventure. But, it will have to wait until another day when normal function of my brain returns.

It's ginormous

So, tomorrow we are headed to Atlanta for a ginormous volleyball tournament. I've never done this big one before. But, from what they say, it's ginormous. And by "they", I mean Connie. I asked her about it, and she said, "It's ginormous."

It's a six hour drive.

Six.

Six hours.

If I'm going to drive six hours, I should at least be rewarded with a beach. Or a Mouse.

Instead, I think I've got over 150 volleyball courts in my future. For three days.

Do y'all know how loud 150 volleyball courts is going to be?

Loud.

(Note to self: Pack Advil....)

So, after all that frivolity, it's a six hour drive back home.

Six.

Six hours.

Any trip that involves a time change and the possibility of mass transit is serious business.

At this point, another Crazy Volleyball Mom is driving, so Jordan and I are riding with her. Yesterday, it appeared there was a teeeeny chance that she was going to bail on me. And for about thirty minutes, I bordered on a panic attack. But I pulled myself together.

No, the Captain and Coop aren't making this trip. The Captain is headed to Nashville today. For just two days. And Cooper has school and all. Plus, he has a game on Thursday night.

Oh, how did he do last night? How sweet of you to ask. He had a single, two RBIs, and a stolen base. And he looked darn cute.

See?

Yay Number Twelve! (JuJu, please forward this link to Cute Baseball Coach Brother. I'm sure he will want to see a pic of an ADORABLE recruit.)

Lots to do today. Including squeezing in eight hours of work........But my Hair Girl was able to get me worked in this afternoon. I wept with joy.

I'll be checking out of the ol' blog until Monday. So y'all play nice while I'm gone.

i got nothing but a picture of a bruise

It was a long, LONG, LONNNNNNNNNNNNNNNG volleyballious weekendious.

It featured WINS. Yea!! And losses. Blah.

And the Captain's birthday! Woot!

I'm wiped out.

And my brain isn't working. At. All.

So I got nothing.

Instead, I'll just show you a picture of Jordan's arm. All hail the back row swagger.

Weatha'

Yep, volleyball this weekend.

In Nashville.

(Hey Busy Mom!)

Anyhoo, they are predicting some Auntie Em type weather for middle Tennessee during the exact time we'll be pushing through there. Awesome.

March. He's coming in like a lion.

Guess the good news is we won't knock ourselves out to get out the door this afternoon. Will probably try to get behind the bad stuff. Maybe we can ride the tailwind. And get there in less than two hours. Yes.

Right now, it's 5am and I'm making pasta salad. Don't ask...

I'm also trying to figure out how to get back over to a "not near my house or office" Target to get a bag of items that I apparently left at the checkout. It's got important stuff in it... like hair spray, deoderant and eye cream.

Shoot. My mayo is in that bag too.

{pressing pause on the pasta salad}

Gotta' go rouse the masses. Y'all have a good day. See you Monday!!

From the weekend...

Well, let's see....

I'll sum up our little weekend in Huntsville.

I forgot half my clothes.

There was lots of volleyball involved. Let's just sum that little piece up as good, bad, and ugly.

Car convo topics included:
steel mills
turpentine
World War II
traffic lights
pickles
kerosene
iPh*ne chargers
storm shelters


I apparently misread the info and thought the hotel had a microwave and frig. In an effort to not only provide a healthy breakfast for my people, but also attempt to be fiscally responsible, I had brought some little bacon, egg muffin things. Needless to say, without a microwave and a frig, they were a little challenging. But, never fear, since I'm a total goober, I heated them up yesterday using hot shower water and an ice bucket. Desperate times call for desperate measures.

Jordan woke up at 2:30 in the morning, sat up in bed, and screamed, "WHERE ARE MY PILLOWS?! WHERE ARE MY PILLOWS?!"

Yes, we're back on the road this weekend for Round 2 of 3 back-to-back volleyball tourny weekends.

So, more adventures coming our way. Wheeeeee!

Creepy.

So, yeah, we were out of town for a volleyball tournament this weekend. (See also: What else is new)

Checking in to the hotel Friday night I found out there was a ghost hunting group there also.

Wait, Mr. Front Desk Guy - before you check me in - I need a little more info.

The hotel was built in 1929 and had been vacant for over 40 years before it was renovated a few years ago. And so the story goes.... the place is haunted. And the ghosts make most of their appearances around Valentine's Day.

Humph.

I heard no bumps in the night.

All I heard was the sound of my three people snoring.

Had some great volleyball this weekend. Only lost one match all weekend and the girls ended up with finishing third out of 12 teams. Jordan did well and her thumb didn't seem to be bothering her at all. Especially since she was taped up like a mummy.

We played a team from Louisiana. They had a Barbie voodoo doll. Complete with what appeared to be chicken feathers all over it. They would shake it at the teams. I didn't ask them about it for fear they would shake it at me.

Anyway, it was great weekend. Ghost hunters, voodoo dolls, and all.

And there's some winter weather headed our way today.

Peace out.

Full Moon

How was your day, dear?

This is how yesterday played out for me.

I played Twinkle Twinkle Little Star with nine other people in front of ninety people.

I found out my boss has been eating Milk Bone dog biscuits on a regular basis since he was a kid. Aren't there TV shows about stuff like that?

I got a text from Jordan that went something like this, "Ummm, don't freak out, but Cooper just ran away."

Yes, he ran away.

He was mad at my mother-in-law for not buying him some fake blood.

Yes, it was for wrestling.

They found him.

He didn't get far.

He left a note for Jordan that said, "I'm running away. I'm not treated fairly. Love you, Cooper."

Later when I asked him how he thought I felt when I heard he ran away, he said, "Sad, mad, and famished?" Bonus points for using a vocabulary word.

Connie was involved in a hit and run. SHE'S FINE.

I was on the phone with her when it happened. A little damage to her car. But apparently nothing like the damage that the other guy had. There was a witness who tole her the other guy's mirror was ripped off and his car all messed up. Serves him right. Jerk. As a good junior deputy, she got his tag. He'll be sorry about all that. You can't just ram a car and drive off. Even if it is a green mini van.

The Captain went to wait with her while the appropriate officers made the scene.

Told Cooper he had to go with me to take Jordan to volleyball.

Fit. Pitch.

Told him to grab a bowl of soup before we go.

Another fit pitched because I was making him eat "YUCKY" soup.

Fine.

Reminded Cooper he had a science test to study for.

Was informed that he didn't care and school is stupid.

Tried to pitch another fit.

Kibosh.

He had a major case of the can't help its yesterday.

Took Jordan to practice and watched her try to push through the pain in her thumb.

After talking with the coach, I ran up to the store and got a brace that she could play in. While I was waiting in the check out line, I was pretty sure the guy in front of me had a gun in his pocket and was about to rob the place.

It wasn't a gun.

He didn't rob the place.

He just bought some cigarettes.

Whew.

Original plans for last night were to pack for this weekend's volleyball tourney, do laundry, change sheets and all that stuff.

Jordan asked me to stay with her at practice.

So I did.

Then on the way home, I tried to help her sort through rollercoaster emotions. I clearly didn't so a very good job with that. Sigh....

And then our route home was blocked off by 343741209 police cars.

So we took a longer route home.

And I got home at 10:30 and found the Captain had left the pot of delicious soup out for us to eat. But we weren't hungry for delicious soup at 10:30. So I had to wash the pot of delicious soup at 10:30.

Final: Thursday 27 Angie 0

In summary...

The weekend.... in summary....

It was my birthday.
It was a good one.
I spent 15 hours of it at a volleyball tournament.
But Jordan didn't play.
Because of this....



It's only for two weeks.
Slight tear of the ligament in her thumb.
Yes, she did it playing volleyball.

Yes, it's her right hand.
Yes, she's right handed.
Yes, she asked me to help her shave her legs.
And cut her meat.

Cooper's Man Cave has made a reappearance.

I had a hot date with the Captain Friday night.
He may or may not have used my readers to check out the menu.

That's about the extent of my weekend.....

I could use one more day off.
To no avail....

Check.

First volleyball tournament of the year. Check.

Third place finish. Check.

Good playing. Good team. Good parents. Good coach. Check. Check. Check. Check.

Captain pulled over by Mr. State Trooper on the way home. Check.

Home sweet home. Check.

Fall in bed just in time to hear tornado sirens. Check.

Super tired on a Monday morning. Check.

Counting the hours until I'm back home to my heated throw and monkey slippers. Check.